When cool kids implode.

Posted 7/22/2008 by WHayes in Labels: , , , , , ,

I'm all for new and trendy music...well, some new and trendy music. I've never, however, been able to get into The Twelves. To make sense of what I'm about to say, however, I need to make a few points.

A culture runs into problems when it starts coming up with its own special names for the insignificant shit it loves. Similarly, a culture will run into trouble when it falls in further love with the insignificant shit it loves: "alt," "blog house," Steve Aoki the "DJ." The devil this time? Party photo websites. I'll admit that six months ago, I thought that balding pederast The Cobrasnake was pretty cool. The photos he took seemed fun and natural, and I even bought one of those t-shirts. But when I noticed that the same, vapid, "alt" faces were showing up in each photo, I had to reconsider my opinion. Even the t-shirt had a larger corporate logo on the back, proof that something which seemed on the outside to be independent and an example of a freer culture was really just the latest piece of marketed "cool" to sell to the Urban Outfitters zombie (w)hordes.

This brings me back to The Twelves. As aforementioned, the band's music never fully appealed to me. It was too 13 year old hipster-in-training; music designed for iPod use only while burning through daddy's credit card at American Apparel. Its music for girls that look like this:

And that aint good.

But you can never count a band out for too long; you never know what they might surprise you with. This in mind, I decided to give the group another try, just to see if I could find something I liked. All those dreams came crashing down when then I heard their new single, "Works for Me."

To sum up everything I hated about this oh-so-sugary cotton candy-flavored effluvium, I present one lyric:

"I want to be in your photos from last night."

Not "I want to hold your hand," or "I want to fuck you like an animal," or even a measly "excuse me miss, what's your name," but "in your photos?" What the fuck? Pictures? Since when did fucking pictures replace the phone number or (heaven forbid) the kiss as a sign you had formed a bond with someone who thought you were interesting? Maybe I'm overreacting, or maybe I've reached a point of clarity where I realize that some fads just don't last before either they implode, or you've gotta grow the fuck out of them. Here's to a culture that's starting to take itself a little too seriously.

Fuck this, I'm going back to garage.

4 comment(s) to... “When cool kids implode.”


smartblackboy said...

wow. can i be the first to say that this is an iconic post.

WHayes said...

haha, why thank you.

CtotheB said...

Tell em why you mad son!!!

Ericka said...

yeah. I dont understand why there has been an explosion of photos to prove how great your night was...Or maybe it's just an illusion.

That's what we're moving toward. Ew.

And I agree.. Iconic.

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